Why Should You Be Weak?
“If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”
Did your mom say it to you too?
It seems like that was the mantra of how to be a Christian back when I was growing up. Maybe it was just my family or community. Then again, maybe not. The book No More Christian Nice Guy by Paul Coughlin was written to challenge believers to rethink this notion of “niceness” as a Christian characteristic. Coughlin argues that niceness is in fact a façade covering weakness.
The definition of weakness includes the words ‘deficient’, ‘lacking’, and ‘not able to function properly.’ I don’t think any of us truly want to be described this way. Of course, there are some who use their weakness as a way to get their needs met. But more often, people find ways to cover over their deficiencies and inabilities. Unfortunately, niceness has long been a socially acceptable form of exhibiting weakness. But consider this: niceness is not one of the fruits of the Spirit.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” (Galatians 5:22-23, NIV)
Every one of these attributes requires strength, not weak niceties.
Now, the fact is that on my own, I am weak. And so are you. It’s part of the human condition in this fallen world. We cannot begin to overcome our weaknesses until we acknowledge that we are covering it over with socially acceptable, ‘Christian’ words and activities.
The good news is that we are no longer on our own. Christ is in us, and we are in Christ!
Just last week, I woke up and did not feel like facing the day. In the 10 weeks surrounding the writing of this article, we’ve purchased a home in another city, sold the home we’ve been living in for 20 years, sorted and packed most of our belongings, had two kids graduate, and will celebrate my daughter’s wedding this coming weekend! To say I’m a bit tired is an understatement. And at times, I feel weak in that tiredness.
Thankfully, our success as believers does not depend upon our own strength. The psalmist wrote, “The LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” (Psalm 27:1b, ASV). And the prophet Daniel affirmed that “the people who know their God will be strong and take action” (Daniel 11:32b, HCSB).
The apostle Paul prayed that we would know the “immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places” (Ephesians 1:19-20) and that “he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith” (Ephesians 3:16-17, ESV).
So, what did I do when I didn’t feel like facing the day? I simply started with what I could do. I shaved (not a huge accomplishment!), prayed, and listened to worship music. Within a short time, the Lord strengthened me and provided what I needed for that day.
Another time I felt the Lord strengthen me was when I preached at my Mom’s funeral after her sudden death 17 years ago. My wife tells me that after I prayed and invited the Lord to strengthen me, she heard a distinct difference in my voice. From that point on, I spoke clear and strong. I know that was not by my will power; no, the Lord strengthened me that day to speak what He had put on my heart to share.
My determination is not my strength.
My will to achieve is not my strength.
My job or income is not my strength.
My intelligence is not my strength.
My friends are not my strength!
Your—or my—personality, resilience, wealth, knowledge, accomplishments, or other people are not our strength.
The Lord is my strength. The Lord is your strength.
Dear Saints, when you are feeling weak, what is it that you resort to? This world provides plenty of opportunities to escape. We may run to some kind of material comfort or cling to friends or family to cover up our feelings of weakness. Or we may resort to niceties to avoid doing the hard thing and standing for truth and righteousness because it’s “easier.”
On the other hand, we may buckle down in determination to overcome our weakness through our own strength. Or we might choose to summon up our will to fight and intimate others into backing down. But whether we “fight or flee” when confronted with our weakness, we are not acknowledging the strength of God living inside of us.
We don’t need to settle for weak, Christian “niceness” OR for operating out of our own will power. Because we are in Christ and He is in us by the Holy Spirit, we have the power of God that raised Christ from the dead freely available to us. Is there anything stronger!?!
So, “Be alert, stand firm in the faith, be brave and strong. Your every action must be done with love” (1 Corinthians 16:13-14, HCSB).