How to Navigate Family Problems at Christmas

Got family problems?  Drama? Division? Discord? If so, you aren’t alone, and this Christmas season can be extra difficult as you prepare to spend time with those who may be difficult to be with… so what should you do?

See the Opportunity. Although times together with hard-to-bear-with family members are often a dreaded occurrence, we should consider them an opportunity. An opportunity to make peace before the next family funeral. An opportunity to show underserved forgiveness and kindness. An opportunity to overflow the love of Jesus as we celebrate His birth.

If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.
Romans 12:18

Seek God. Ask God to show you how to handle the ongoing family problems. Ask Him to reveal to you your own areas of improvement. Ask Jesus to prepare your own heart for the family gatherings ahead and to give you wisdom of when to speak and when to be silent. Pray for those who have hurt you and ask God to change their heart. Have lost loved ones? Ask God to use you in the salvation of their souls!

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
James 5:16

Humbly Confess. Confession is hard. We could all improve how we handled most scenarios and situations. Look back with honesty at past family conflicts. How did you do? Were you angry? Harsh? Unkind? Avoidant? Maybe there is someone you need to say “sorry” to. That one word can be incredibly hard to utter, but saying “sorry” specifically can cause wonderful relational healing when spoken with a humble heart.

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.
Colossians 3:12–13

Patiently Wait. Silence is Golden. Memorize James 1:19-20. Seriously. When someone starts running their mouth, gossiping or insulting or just being annoying…. be slow to speak! Our tongues do so much damage when we speak in haste or anger.

Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
James 1:19–20

Love Them. Where They Are At. Even if they feel like an enemy instead of a family member. That is how Jesus loved us, while we were still His enemies. So let us extend the same sort of love—with a gift, with a dish of food or dessert, with an unexpected act, with a gracious word.

And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.
Colossians 3:14

Choose to make your Christmas Merry… even with the most difficult of family problems!