Why should you let the pressures of life overwhelm you?
I was maintaining my calm, but my voice was shaking with hurt and anger as I met with our landlord. This man I considered a friend and mentor for more than a decade drove the nail in the coffin of our relationship.
As I handed him my 60-day notice to let him know we would be moving out of his rental property, I stated, “I thought things would be different because of the friendship we have…” He interrupted and said, “You mean had.” I was speechless. I hadn’t seen that coming.
Of course, that wasn’t the only thing going on in life.
Our second daughter was only three weeks old, and we had almost lost my wife to a systemic infection after delivery. The pressures of life felt so overwhelming! I was caring for our two small children, attempting to maintain the youth ministry, and had been wrestling with the fear of losing Jen—on top of managing all the other details of life.
And now this.
Apparently, for about a year, this friend and mentor had been seeking to intimidate my parents by threatening to sell the house out from under us. He was trying to manipulate them to agree with him on church board leadership decisions. He finally went through with it.
So, understandably, my voice was trembling with emotion as I handed him our notice.
When we moved out of state the following year, I gave the Lord an ultimatum. That never goes well! I said that I never wanted to be in ministry again. It was too painful. I just wanted a normal job.
We still loved the Church. It wasn’t the Church that hurt me; it was the ungodly manipulations of a man who was used to getting his own way by throwing money around. I just didn’t want to put myself or my family in the line of fire again. So, our plan was to visit the largest churches in town, not tell anyone I had ever been a pastor, and just serve quietly the rest of our days.
While I’m no Job, the Lord’s words to him certainly applied to me: “Who is this who darkens my counsel by words without knowledge?” (Job 38:2, NIV)
Twenty plus years later, I’m incredibly grateful that the Lord didn’t take my counsel.
Rather, in the midst of it all, I learned a few important lessons: about God’s character, life on earth, and how to have peace no matter what happens.
In John 16, Jesus was preparing his disciples for what he knew was coming—His betrayal, beating, crucifixion, and death. All the disciples’ hopes and dreams were going to be dashed because they were not thinking according to the plan of God. Later, when they did align with God’s will and ways, they would suffer persecution, beatings and death.
At the end of delivering the bad news, Jesus said, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).
Jesus hadn’t yet gone through the most horrible suffering the world had ever seen. He knew it was coming soon. But He was at peace, knowing that victory over sin, death, and Satan was real. He also knew the Father was with him: “Yet I am not alone, for the Father is with me” (John 16:32, ESV).
Dear Saints, we are not meant to face the overwhelming pressures of this world by ourselves. Be careful not to buy into the world’s philosophy and adopt an independent spirit. We can always be assured that the Father is with us. And we have a Church body, a family, for a reason. The Apostle Paul said it this way: “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ… each will have to bear his own load.” (Galatians 6:2 & 5, ESV)
Interestingly, these are not contradictory statements. We each have personal responsibility. At the same time, there are situations too heavy for us to bear alone. We need to be in healthy community so that these burdens can be shared.
Beware: not everyone is safe or will help you. Some will push their own agenda to your detriment. Forgive them and learn who is safe.
After I had forgiven our landlord, I approached him to seek reconciliation. He justified his actions and made excuses for himself, ultimately blaming me. It was sad, but I learned some important lessons during that time period.
As we submit to God and His Sovereign plan, we should not be surprised when we face trials. We learn what is ours to carry and who we can trust to help us carry what is too heavy.
Our peace cannot come from our circumstances in this world. Rather, our peace comes from knowing Jesus, the one who has overcome the world.